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Currently this journal is split between friendslocked personal entries and public fic.

It's highly unlikely that I'm going to add anyone else to this journal, because:

1) all future fic will be archived at my AO3, and

2) it's unlikely that I'll be making any more personal posts here. i'll play it by ear.

In the mean time, you can find me on tumblr.

Index Post

For all your navigational needs... as long as you want to navigate to something I've written. Things without links are 'coming up soon!' type attractions. Which means they could be in any state of half-written, already-written, sort-of-written. Etc. But they will be written.

Click for FicCollapse )

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Somebody asked at some point, so here are two downloadable versions of the heist story at Mediafire. The first is a docx, the second is a pdf.

Blood, Like Pasta, is Thicker Than Water [Original Journal Version]
Blood, Like Pasta, is Thicker Than Water [January 2011 Self-edit + Minor Additions]

NOTE: The first version is what is currently still on this journal. Eventually I will phase in the second. It's not dramatically different, but I changed the phrasing in quite a few places and expanded a scene or two. However, if you find you prefer JV1, that link up there will one day be the only place to find it. JV1 was slightly different from the km version.

(Just tell me if it isn't opening properly or you want a different filetype. I only bite when asked nicely.)
Title: (Don't) Need an Aphrodisiac If I've Got You
Rating: R
Characters/Pairings: Romano/Spain, France, Prussia
Warnings: Human AU, Romano, amateur sexcapades, a clean colon is a happy colon
Summary: "Basically the usual suspects as awkward teenagers; enthusiastically consensual but really, really awkward and surprisingly stupidly executed first time. ("Surely would never lie to you, right? Right???") Something silly and stupid and rather unsexy (to the reader, at least), basically."
Notes: For zieb. Can also be read at AO3

When he is seventeen, going on eighteen, Antonio decides, after much consultation with his friends, to give himself as a birthday present.Collapse )

[Fic] Trashcans are not Windmills

Title: Trashcans are not Windmills
Rating: PG-13
Characters/Pairings: femRomano/femSpain, Seborga
Warnings: Human AU, genderbend, Romano, not waffles
Summary: Inspiration comes in many forms, although the best, Antonia knows, is the form of a woman.
Notes: Happy Birthday zike!!

As she steps down the street her heels click a quick clip against the cobblestones, and she absently rifles through her purse for her scarf.Collapse )

Fic: Sunset

Title: Sunset
Rating: PG-13
Characters/Pairings: Romano/Spain
Warnings: old!AU, Romano, smarmy old men
Summary: The world is changing, but that doesn’t mean Spain and Romano have to change with it.
Notes: for zieb

It is generally agreed upon that Earth is dying, but Spain doesn’t like to think about any of that.Collapse )

Fic: Now I Lay Me Down

Title: Now I Lay Me Down
Rating: PG(-13 for Midna)
Fandom: Legend of Zelda: Twilight Princess
Characters/Pairings: Link, Midna, Hena, Ooccoo, Golden Wolf
Warnings: doesn't everybody know who GW is by now?, questionable meals, pot(s)
Summary: A kingdom built over hundreds of years is not saved in a single day. Or, five times Link falls asleep.
Notes: inspired by a thought that always comes to me whenever I play these games: yes, but where does he sleep?

Alternatively titled: Five Times Link Passed Out In Inappropriate Places.Collapse )

Fic: But Their Hearts Forever

Title: But Their Hearts Forever
Rating: PG(-13 for Romano’s filthy vocabulary)
Characters/Pairings: Romano/femRomano/Spain/femSpain, OC kids, Spaincat
Warnings: Human AU, polyamory, miscommunication, kind of sad at the end
Summary: Lovina has Alejandro. Antonia has Celio. Against the odds, Antonio has Gisella. Romano might think he’s gotten off easy, but really he was the first mother out of all of them. Or: five times Romano was a mom (and one he was not).
Notes: a very belated Mother’s Day fic for cutthroatpixie’s OT4verse.

Javier’s first memory is of being very small, very cold, and very wet.Collapse )

Fic: Some Assembly Required

Title: Some Assembly Required
Rating: PG-13 if you don’t mind that rest of the series is about making porn
Characters/Pairings: Finland, Sweden
Warnings: porno AU, stupid jokes, IKEA, no I don’t think all Finns are alcoholics, I bet Cloud Cuckooland has an IKEA, I don’t write Finland moe
Summary: Berwald Oxenstierna walks into an IKEA looking for cheap furniture. He gets a bookcase, two defective chairs, and a crush on a drunken sales associate. Oh.
Notes: set in the same universe as Brown Paper Crush. What passes for plot totally yoinked from this video.

Tino is a man in his thirties, with a body that stalled in his twenties, and a face that stopped aging somewhere around nineteen.Collapse )

Fic: Odds and Ends 3

This was supposed to be my short story / musical-themed ficset, but it seems its become the place for me to archive the things I write on tumblr in a more collected manner. If you stalk around there odds are you've seen all of this before:

Title: Showing the Ropes
Rating: PG-13
Characters/Pairings: Sherlock Holmes, John Watson [BBC Sherlock]
Warnings: silliness
Summary: They're supposed to have rules.
Notes: An anon prompted 'bondage' for some meme and I responded with something mostly different.
John and Sherlock have a rule on Wednesdays.Collapse )

Title: The Doctor's Waiting
Rating: PG
Characters/Pairings: Sherlock Holmes [BBC Sherlock], Amy Pond [Doctor Who]
Warnings: more silliness, I can't write Sherlock, but I can write the Doctor even less
Summary: Sherlock sends for John at a case. He doesn't get John.
Notes: Same anon prompted wholock after the one above.
When a flighty young woman...Collapse )

Title: It Means Exceptionally Good-Looking
Rating: PG
Characters/Pairings: Spain, Prussia
Warnings: more silliness, Human AU, urinals, DAT ASS
Summary: Spain reads the urinal graffiti.
Notes: for cutthroatpixie for a word prompt meme
Antonio"s just looking up from the urinal when he sees it scribbled along the wall, right in front of his eyes.Collapse )

Title: Earth, Wind, Water, Fire
Rating: PG
Characters/Pairings: John Watson [BBC Sherlock]
Warnings: less silliness, magazine quizzes, spoilers if you still haven't seen Reichenbach?
Summary: John Watson sees the wind.
Notes: prompt was 'diaphonous'
If asked to pick an element to describe himself, John Watson would not pick Wind, because that"s not an element, now is it?Collapse )

Title: Heart
Rating: PG
Characters/Pairings: Germany/Veneziano
Warnings: moderate silliness, Germany's melodramatic heart
Summary: Germany doesn't know how to deal with these things called 'feelings'.
Notes: prompt was 'Germany/Italy'
Germany"s heart soars when it has no business to.Collapse )

Title: Family Business
Rating: PG
Characters/Pairings: femJapan/Veneziano, Romano
Warnings: moderate silliness, suspiciously familiar Human AU, genderbend, Romano and alcohol
Summary: Kiku's family always had high expectations for her.
Notes: for charlzway because she wanted Japan/N.Italy
Kiku"s family had been in the restaurant business since before humanity really had the concept of cooked meals down and registered as something beneficial.Collapse )

Title: But It Would Be a Bad Idea Though
Rating: PG-13
Characters/Pairings: Romano/Spain, referenced past Spain/Others
Warnings: silliness, Romano, stealth angst, mostly schmoop, Spain's POV is weird, capslock
Summary: Spain realizes he's in love with Romano.
Notes: for frostwhisker because she wanted 'extremely well-written fluffy Spamano' and had a cat gif. I don't know about extremely well-written, but it's mostly fluffy. Mostly.
Spain decided, one afternoon, in the middle of a step, in the middle of the road, that he was in love.Collapse )

Title: Language of Flowers
Rating: PG-13
Characters/Pairings: Sherlock Holmes [BBC Sherlock]
Warnings: silliness, disdain, deductions, the word torrid
Summary: Sherlock Holmes is a florist; what of it?
Notes: monopoli said she'd never speak to me again if I wrote a Sherlock florist AU. :D
Sherlock Holmes doesn"t hate people.Collapse )

Title: The Best Part of Waking Up, Motherfuckers
Rating: PG-13
Characters/Pairings: America + Romano
Warnings: Romano, more silliness
Summary: America knows how to do coffee right.
Notes: for fireblazie. Prompt was 'America attempts to brew Romano a cup of coffee'.
Romano knows it"s all going to shit when he sees America pull a bright red plastic tub out of a cupboard covered in construction paper and... macaroni?Collapse )

Title: Tattoo
Rating: PG-15
Characters/Pairings: Romano, implied Romano/Spain
Warnings: Romano's foul mouth, talk of death
Summary: Romano does not use his partial immortality responsibly, but that's the stupid punch drunk love's alcohol's fault.
Notes:Another word meme, prompt was the title. I like this one a lot, too.
Romano is really glad he"s mostly immortal, sometimes, because mostly immortality comes with a lot of convenient rules regarding his body and his ability to heal.Collapse )

That's it then. There are a few more of a more adult nature, but they'll get their own post later.

Fic: Brown Paper Crush

Title: Brown Paper Crush
Rating: PG-15 if you don’t mind that the whole thing’s about making porn
Characters/Pairings: Romano/Spain, Rome, Veneziano, Switzerland, Prussia
Warnings: Human AU, porno AU, stupid jokes
Summary: Romano Vargas is a (101% heterosexual) gay porn star. His interests include not sucking cock, not taking it up the ass, and interior design. Not that anybody ever asks about his interests; until one day, on some dumbass book tour, somebody does.
Notes: For zieb, whose appreciation and art for this universe are both very inspirational.

Porn stars don’t normally have book signings, but porn stars don’t normally have multi-billion euro production companies either.Collapse )

Fic: Twenty-Five Against the Dealer

Title: Twenty-Five Against the Dealer
Rating: R-lite
Characters/Pairings: Romano/Spain/fem!Romano/fem!Spain OT4, OC kid, Spaincat
Warnings: Human AU, genderbend, polyamory, a little bit of gratuitous Italian, star wars?
Summary: What is life without a little bit of chaos?
Notes: 25 snippets based on some headcanons cutthroatpixie requested on tumblr for her Six In One verse, wherein a square of Romanos and Spains exist and have shenanigans together.

Once they tried to take a sexy shower together...Collapse )

Fic: Soup for the Soul [10/20]

Title: Soup for the Soul [10/20]
Rating: PG-13
Characters/Pairings: femRomano/Spain, mini!Romano
Warnings: AU, genderbend, Romano x2, Spain schemes, gratuitous chewing
Summary: Lovina does not forget the essentials on purpose. It’s just very convenient to share Antonio’s trips for groceries.

As always, the phone rang at half past eleven; just when Lovina expected it to.Collapse )

Fic: Odds and Ends 2

Or, I've been writing lots of little things on tumblr and wanted to collect them here. This batch is from a few recent memes. And Zike.

Title: Hats
Rating: PG
Characters/Pairings: Chibitalia/HRE
Warnings: none
Summary: Drabble meme. HRE keeps a sketch of a cute little maid in his hat. Chibitalia cleans his hat every night.

HatsCollapse )

Title: The Tale of the Very Very Very Very Stinky Garlic
Rating: PG
Characters/Pairings: Romano/Spain
Warnings: Romano, Spain's dramatics, did anyone notice I took part of the scene from a jusc0 doujin?
Summary: Drabble meme. Anon asked for Spain and Romano and stinky garlic breath. Who am I to deny?

Garlic can be deadlyCollapse )

Title: Soup for the Soul Outtake
Rating: PG
Characters/Pairings: femRomano/Spain, miniRomano
Warnings: Romano x2, silliness
Summary: Zike asked for a bedtime story. I delivered. I doubt I will ever use this in the real Soup canon, so here it shall live.


Title: Fellatio 101
Rating: R
Characters/Pairings: Romano/Spain
Warnings: Romano, blowjob, i cannot the sexy
Summary: Porn meme. Request was spamano. So Romano has Spain sucking him off from under the desk while Romano does paperwork.

Cocksucking is an artformCollapse )

Title: That Potent
Rating: R
Characters/Pairings: Hungary/Prussia
Warnings: i cannot the sexy
Summary: Porn meme. Request was PruHun. I don't even know. Hungary wears the pants.

All the ladies.Collapse )

Title: 80%
Rating: R
Characters/Pairings: Belgium/Switzerland
Warnings: i cannot the sexy
Summary: Porn meme. Request was SwissBel and hot chocolate. I... deviated a little.

Not quite.Collapse )

Title: Femano on Boobs [i don't know, i don't title these things]
Rating: R
Characters/Pairings: femRomano/femSpain
Warnings: i cannot the sexy, genderbend
Summary: Porn meme. Request was nyotalia spamano. I like how it turned out.

Femano and femSpain get it on.Collapse )

Fic: The Breakfast Club

Title: The Breakfast Club
Characters/Pairings: Romano/Spain, Prussia, England, Japan, Veneziano, China, Rome
Word Count: 3,038
Rating: PG-13
Warnings: Gakuen AU, Romano’s filthy vocabulary, so much awkward, food
Summary: Breakfast may be the best way to start the day, but love confessions aren’t bad either.
Note: Happy January! This fic doesn’t have anything to do with the movie of the same name; I was just thinking about food a lot when I wrote it.

The Breakfast ClubCollapse )

Fic: It's in His Kiss

Title: It’s in His Kiss
Characters/Pairing: Romano/Spain, at first some Spain->Veneziano, Prussia->Hungary, FrUk
Word Count: 5366
Rating: PG-13
Warnings: Romano’s mouth, angst, fluff
Summary: The year is 2005, and Spain can now marry the man of his dreams: Italy Veneziano. Spain enlists his close friend, Italy Romano, to help him on the path towards wedded bliss, but something feels wrong. It isn’t until Spain acts on some special advice that he sees what was in front of him all along.
Note:I confess Spain’s a bit stupid in this. I hope, though, that it isn’t obnoxious.

But Spain can’t do it alone. And that’s where Romano comes in.Collapse )

Fic: Stubbornly, Achingly, Stupidly

Title: Stubbornly, Achingly, Stupidly
Characters/Pairings: Romano->Spain, Spain/Veneziano
Word Count: 1,013
Rating: PG-13
Warnings: angst, Romano
Summary: Romano’s love is a gift he will never send.
Notes: written for aoi00hime because I was prompt-paranoid for this year’s spamano exchange.

Romano is in love with Spain.Collapse )

Fic: Yellow

Title: Yellow
Rating: PG
Characters/Pairings: Bel/Swiss, femGer/N.Italy, Japan, past femAustria/Spain, Romano
Warnings: Human AU, genderbend, cyberpunk, Significantly Capitalized Words, series, puns
Summary: In a world where the dead can come back to life via technological advancements, Belle Mertens faces life with a smile and Vash Zwingli is grudgingly in love with his best friend.
Word Count: 5,224
Note: a very belated help_japan fic for glory_of_hera! A little world building turned into a lot of world building, accidentally, so this also belongs in a universe of fics that have yet to be written.

The one place in Schengen where time stood still was in the ARTIST’s district, and that was only because the district was more of a series of fancy warehouses than a real part of the city.Collapse )

Fic: Meanwhile, He Waits

Title: Meanwhile, He Waits
Rating: PG, PG-13 for Romano
Characters/Pairings: Romano/Spain
Warnings: fluff, Romano, drunken antics, Spain is not the crayon with the best memory
Summary: Romano leaves a note for Spain one day: “I’m waiting for you at our place.” Cue Spain running around, trying to remember where exactly that is.
Note: written in February or March for a Spamano project that didn’t quite get off the ground. If another one of those rolls around I’ll write something fresh for it. In the meantime, enjoy.

Spain woke to birdsong, sunshine, and a love letter.Collapse )
Title: on the dimensionality of an n-night stand
Rating: R lite
Characters/Pairings: Romano/Spain, Veneziano, implied Germany/Veneziano, Prussia, France
Warnings: *intoxicated sex of dubious consent alluded to*, minor gay crisis, Uni AU, Romano, frat boys, DAT ASS
Summary: Antonio is the one night stand who just won’t leave.
Note: This was a drabble for about two seconds. Prompt by rivals.

Lovino and Antonio meet at a party, although Lovino quickly forgets most of that night after his ninth shot of something that burns a little bit more than the others burnt.Collapse )

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